Friday, July 30, 2010

It's Just Not Appropriate


I had the naked dream last night. You know the one-you show up to your everyday life but you forgot to wear clothes.


In this particular one, I was in some sort of competition on stage (a spelling bee?). I was also vaguely aware of the fact that I was a counselor at summer camp.


I have these semi-regularly but always with one distinct difference from the textbook example.


I am ALWAYS in a towel, never naked.


I really appreciate that even in my subconscious, worst case scenario imaginings, my modesty and body shame creeps in to provide a modicum of decency. In terry cloth form.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The Reason I Act Like This




Its generally agreed, by most who know me, that I am a little bit crazy. I like to think that in small doses and/or if you really love me it is endearing.


And when I receive e-mails like this one from my mother, I know that my particular brand of crazy is hereditary:



Subject: oh the humiliation‏
From: xxxxxx, Mxxx (xxxxxxx@xxxx.Net)
Sent: Tue 7/20/10 2:05 PM
To: xxxxxxxxxx@msn.com



I just discovered that my Spanks cami is on backwards. I thought the neck was awfully high in the front so I checked just to be sure. Sure enough, there was the tag.
The problem is that it is so snug that it would be very difficult to change around in the bathroom, so I guess I'll have it backwards for the rest of the day.
Now that I know it it feels like it's choking me.
FULL LEGAL DISCLOSURE: The above picture is not my mother.